


breathe out; breathe in

by urhqtrash



Category: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Canon-Typical Violence, F/M, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Underage Smoking
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-18
Updated: 2020-05-19
Packaged: 2021-03-03 02:27:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,297
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24247255
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/urhqtrash/pseuds/urhqtrash
Summary: Neil Josten, formerly Nathaniel Wesninski, has spent his entire life trapped in a series of small towns after his mother's new husband had negotiated for his freedom. Raised by a series of inattentive guards, his focus has only ever been on exy and running and math. The first two bring recruiters to millport and the latter gives him a reason to say yes.a.k.a what if mary hatford fled to a former flame and west-coast mob boss with her son after the first trial at evermore? what if hernandez was closer to the truth than he thought & neil had more stats to back up his playing? and what if he cared for track more than he cared for exy?
Relationships: Neil Josten/Andrew Minyard
Comments: 7
Kudos: 52





	1. Signing His Life Away

**Author's Note:**

> Potential Triggers: smoking, mentions of neglect / child abandonment, violence 
> 
> This is my first work in the fandom, I have some ideas laid out for where this is going so hopefully you enjoy and I'll update when I have more ready!

The cigarette burns down to the filter in his hands, acrid smoke filling the air around him but never quite reaching his lungs. Smoking is bad, his coaches voices echo distantly in his mind; they serve as a reminder that some things are more important than clinging to this distant memory. 

He closes his eyes and breathes in the smell, mind bringing forth an image of his mother as he does so. Wrapped up in his thoughts as he is; he doesn't notice the approaching footsteps of Coach Hernandez until the older man is clearing his throat - probably, Neil reckons about to comment on his "parents" absence from tonight's game. He refuses to acknowledge him for a moment, staring out onto the court as a team works to disassemble the court. 

The Millport Dingoes had lost tonight, but next week practices for track and field were ramping up, so the timing wasn't really so bad. It did suck that they had made it so close to semi-finals to lose by one point but Neil was familiar with the feeling of things slipping through his fingertips. 

"Your parents weren't at the game tonight," Hernandez begins, tone implying an unasked question that Neil chooses to ignore - how could he possibly explain that his parents were never going to come? "They still out of town or something?" But of course, Coach had to verbalize it - didn't he? 

Neil sighed, knowing that it was suspicion that laced the other's voice and pulled up the excuse that rested on the tip of his tongue, "Another conference, I think. They're going to try to make it out for the track meet." In truth, neil suspected that his parents would be attending yet another conference that weekend since his actual parents didn't live anywhere near Millport and the goons that were currently posing as his parents had no interest in attending his sporting events. The lie would have to be good enough, he supposed. "I'll call them later, with the results."

It was Hernandez's turn to sigh, clearly agitated with the lack of answers. "Either way kid, there's a couple of coaches here to see you." Three days before the dead period that marked the end of the NCAA recruitment period and there were coaches in this shitty little town? He'd had offers already, mind you, but he should give this a chance he supposed. Sighing more for impact than out of actual emotion, Neil made a show of slinging his gear bag over his shoulder and following Hernandez into the locker room. 

"Josten," a familiar voice greeted as the door swung shut behind him and he nearly tripped in the fumble to spin and face it's source. He stilled upon seeing that it was simply Coach Elliot from palmetto --- his recruitment offer had been good but not quite enough, and Neil found himself curious at how desperate the coach must be to be making a second trip. A folder slammed onto the bench, drawing his attention and his eyes flicked over to the man who had tossed it but after a moment of not recognizing him, they flicked back to Elliot. 

"Coach. Thought you said that was your final offer? I told you I was still making a decision," Neil replied, eyes flicking back to the thick file that was resting on the bench. That wasn't entirely true, Neil had actually pointed out that he was interested in playing two sports if at all possible; and when Elliot had told him that he'd have to catch the foxes' coach's eye, he had shrugged and said that they'd both have to wait and see. "Though I think after that game there's probably not much to think about." 

"That's where you're wrong," the other man interrupted, causing Neil to turn back to him and actually take note of his appearance, realizing that these coaches might actually be here together. Dark skin with a stern set expression and jagged flame tattoos crawling up his arms --- certainly a distinct look and somewhat familiar but there wasn't a name coming to mind so he merely waited. "Heard about your interest in my team, and your coach sent over your file." Ah, this is Wymack - coach of the Palmetto State Foxes, an incurable optimist who collected broken athletes and tried to turn them into a workable Division I team. 

Neil can hear the unspoken statement that he meets the recruitment requirements beyond playing skill --- he's aware that his file is a mess from the sudden name change to the constantly changing custody agreement. His past probably puts some foster kids to shame, honestly, and he's always been glad people seem alright with just calling whomever he's staying with his parents rather than asking any further questions.

"And? Are you interested in making me a fox?" Neil hedges, pushing carefully to get the answer he wants. 

It's not surprising that Elliot interrupts again, he's not the same kind of patient soul as Wymack, but Neil finds himself disappointed nevertheless. He had been hoping to hear what he would say. "He is, we've worked out a tentative schedule and funding program. We've gotten approval for you to move into the dorms early, the rest of the track team will be there and you can relocate to be with the exy team in June if you so choose. Your graduation ceremony is May 11th, so you can fly out May 12th if you want." He holds out a bundle of paper and a pen, a contract Neil knows and he wouldn't be old enough to sign them only he's emancipated - and isn't that fortunate. 

"Can't make plans until after the regional track meet for travel, Nationals is May 13th in Texas." He says, gripping the papers anyways and beginning to flip through them. His stomach clenches at the thought of signing them, of committing to going to school on the east coast but then he thinks of the academic prowess of Palmetto and the reality of not having to worry about paying for school or owing his stepfather anything else. 

"That's fine," Wymack says, voice gruff with an underlying note of surprise --- maybe at neil's quiet confidence that he'll pass regionals or at the fact that he's not arguing with them about any of the other details, just blandly skimming through the contract before nodding. There's a weird clause about confidentiality, saying that he can't tell anyone that he's playing on the exy team until the beginning of June but that's not surprising given the current situation surrounding the signing of Kevin Day. He takes the pen and signs it, name inked onto paper and finalizing the one thing that he's always wanted. 

"See you in May," he replies, handing the contract and pen before slipping past them to jog out the front door. He doesn't see it coming but he definitely feels the impact of the racket as it hits his stomach knocking the air out of his lungs. The light glints of the wood as it falls to the floor and he doubles over in pain, following the racket's path. 


	2. Confrontation in the Lobby

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Trigger Warnings: bruises / violence / past injuries 
> 
> Me, writing a single scene and calling it a chapter: is this how you fanfic?

There's a loud ringing sound that's threatening to overwhelm his senses as Neil manages to take a few shaky breaths before prodding at his abdomen to check for broken bones. Nothing seemed out of place, though he could tell that he was going to have a nasty bruise from the way the flesh stung at the prodding. He managed to stand up and turn to face his assailant, outrage sitting on the tip of his tongue. 

And then he saw Andrew Minyard staring back at him; a manic grin stretched across his face but his eyes looked hollow --- the medicine twisted him somehow. Andrew Minyard, starting goalie for the Palmetto State Foxes and best known for nearly beating four men to death outside of a night club and walking away with mandatory counseling and a mysterious mandatory prescription. Anti-psychotics, Neil thought, then wondered how they could make someone manic. 

He didn't have much time to ponder that line of thought before the gruff voice of Coach Wymack distracted him. "God dammit, Minyard. He already signed, maybe don't break your newest teammate." Andrew argued with him for a moment but the words didn't register with Neil as he shifted around, realization dawning. Kevin and Andrew hadn't been seen apart since Kevin signed with Palmetto in the winter --- what was the likelihood that changed? 

Kevin had after all played for the Edgar Allen Ravens up until that point, a team well known for how creepily close-knit they seemed. Also the team that he was auditioning to play for when his mother ran off with him and subsequently the team whose offer Minyard had refused before signing with the Foxes. That the two were attached at the hip wasn't surprising; the whole world had watched for over a decade as Kevin acted like a shadow to Riko, the man clearly had deep-rooted issues being alone. Neil had no room to judge given his own issues with crowds, but he did have a question. "Wait, is Kevin Day here?"

Wymack and Andrew ceased in their argument, both locking their eyes onto him with different expressions on their face. Andrew seemed intrigued by the realization, while Wymack just seemed surprised that he managed to put it together and was opening his mouth to say something when a voice cut him off. "Hello Nat-"

"It's just Neil, actually." He in turn cut off, sensing that the older striker was about to dredge up a long buried past. Cursing himself, he turned his attention to the approaching figure and was surprised by how tall Kevin was in person. Next to Riko in pictures, he always looked small and some part of Neil couldn't help but remember the boy he had met at Edgar Allan. But this wasn't that boy, he could tell that much --- this was a man who had almost lost the ability to play the sport that he loved and had been forced to sign with one of the lowest ranking teams after leaving the champions. He forced himself to make eye contact, anything to stop from looking at the black two that was etched into his cheek --- the sight of it made him want to retch in a way that even getting the wind knocked out of him with an exy racquet had failed to achieve.

"Neil, then." And he pauses as if waiting for something but Neil is still struggling to breathe, to stand still and not run for the hills, so he is met with nothing for silence. "Your file is a disaster, you've never stuck with a team for longer than a season and you jump from position to position as if you can't decide what you want. But you're fast at least, and you play like you have nothing to lose. I look forward to playing with you." What an asshole, Neil thinks, an asshole gifted with the ability to make insults seem like high praise. 

He opens his mouth to thank him and something entirely different comes out, "Oh, I'm sure. I do have something to lose, you know. Exy is my secondary sport, not the other way around." It's a passion and he loves it, he doesn't say, but running is what gets Neil out of bed most mornings so that takes precedence. "I look forward to playing with you too." He tacks on much to Andrew's amusement before he slips towards the front door and slides out into the parking lot. And despite the way his abdomen aches, he runs towards his house with his gear bag strapped over his shoulder. 

_Dear God_ he thinks, _what have I gotten myself into now?_


	3. Running & Flying

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Neil runs @ nationals and then makes his way to Palmetto.

The day was thick with a humidity that life in Arizona hadn’t prepared Neil for and he took a moment among the chaos of high school athletes to curse whoever decided that a track event outside in Texas was a good idea. His t-shirt was already damp with sweat before he had even ran in a single event and his fingers yearned for the cool comfort of a water bottle. He allowed himself to feel grateful that both of his runs were today, meaning that he had spent yesterday in the shade --- a small luxury that had vanished with Hernandez’s growing nerves. 

Neil’s eyes flicked to the Coach, who had insisted on coming when Neil admitted that his ‘parents’ weren’t going, and caught sight of the frown that tugged at his lips as he stared down at today’s schedule. “Everything alright, Coach?” His run was twenty minutes out but they were standing next to the starting area; it was the second event that might be a close call with a window of 20 minutes between starting times. Neil wasn’t worried about the schedule, knowing that he had clocked the 1600m race to just under 4 minutes and that would leave him with enough time to make it to where he needed to be. After a long moment with no response, Neil leaned in closer and repeated himself.

Hernandez’s eyes tore away from the paper and he shook himself as though trying to relax himself and Neil couldn’t keep from smiling --- it seemed the older man truly had decided to take on the role of parental figure for the day. Complete with unnecessary worry and all. “Just double-checking the schedule. Drink some water before they call you over, you look like you’ve already run, kid.” Neil groaned for show before grabbing one of the water bottles that was tucked away in the cooler bag that Hernandez had brought along, spending the next ten minutes in a comfortable silence until his event was called to gather.

After stowing away the empty bottle, Neil made his way over and settled into position as instructed by a particularly frazzled looking coordinator. And then it all faded away, just a background buzz as he waited for the sound that would mark the start of the match. It sounded and he ran, feet slapping against the dirt in a steady rhythm as he easily passed his competitors --- all he heard was the blood rushing in his ears as he focused on the end goal, thoughts stuck on a loop of run, run, run, run that seemed endless. For a brief moment, he was eight and following his mother as they ran towards freedom but then he was back under the hot Texas sun as a stranger yelled her congratulations. He had done it, but the celebration would have to wait until after the next run.

And it did, even though Hernandez caught up to excitedly ramble on about broken records and victories; he fell back into place at another starting line before allowing those memories to swallow him up again. As he stood at the finish line, shaking hands with a very excited second place, it dawned on him that he liked running more than exy for the control that it granted him but also the control that it took away. 

From there the day seemed to drag on until it was finally time for them to head for the airport after a long banquet dinner. Getting into South Carolina just after midnight wasn’t ideal but Wymack and Elliot had assured him that someone would be there to pick him up, so he wasn’t overly worried as he boarded his flight alone. He would get to South Carolina, crash for the night and tomorrow, the rest of his stuff would arrive tomorrow and then he could settle into practice. 

It didn’t occur to him that he should be concerned until he spotted Coach Elliot waiting for him in Arrivals alongside someone that he only vaguely recognized. He steeled his nerves for a moment before approaching only for the stranger to bounce forward and meet him halfway. “Neil, right? Jackson Pierce, sprinter --- it’s good to meet you, you probably need to grab your bag, right?” He didn’t wait for an answer, just leading him towards the baggage claim while he continued to ramble about how the rest of the team was excited to meet him. “Join us for lunch? Coach is letting you skip practice tomorrow but the team will definitely end up in our room if you don’t meet them by then,” he finished as they stopped in front of the conveyor belt. 

“Don’t see why not, my cousins are dropping by in the morning with my car and the rest of my stuff so I’ll be up,” he replied, shrugging as he continued to scan the belt for his bag. Neil spotted the suitcase as it landed on the belt and started making his way over to it. He made a mental note to remind the goons that had been charged with delivering his car that they were pretending to be his cousins in case anyone asked. 

“Great, you’re the first freshman getting here so you’ll have to put up with the full attention of the team. Especially since Coach told us that you beat some records today, the people who run the same events as you are particularly interested in that.” Neil nodded to indicate that he heard as he reached for the handle of the suitcase only for Jackson to grab it first. "I'll take this for you, you've had a long day I bet. This it?" At Neil's nod, he placed it on the ground and set it up so he could pull it behind them before throwing an arm around Neil's shoulder. He suppressed the flinch for the most part and the older athlete didn't seem to notice as he continued chatting about how best to handle their teammates as they made their way back to Coach Elliot. 

"Alright, Pierce. Too much chit chat for just after midnight, the two of you have all night to catch up if you want," the coach greeted as he lead them out to the waiting car. Neil sat in the backseat, figuring that Jackson needed the legroom far more than him as his teammate place his suitcase in the trunk. "Neil," the coach continued once they were both situated and waiting for Jackson to join them, "Here's your keys, you'll be rooming with Pierce and Long. Don't let him keep the three of you up all night, they have practice tomorrow. There's a team meeting tomorrow at 3, come over after lunch for your physical." 

Silence settled over the car as they drove back towards campus, Neil content to stare out of the window at the blur of bright lights and shadowed buildings. They drove past the athletic buildings and Neil found himself yearning for the tracks and courts that he knew lay within despite how tired he was, the urge to run never quite fading entirely. They stopped at the top of a hill and Jackson clambered out before heading to the trunk, Neil silently and begrudgingly accepting that he wasn't going to be allowed to carry his own bag. "Thanks for the ride," he offered before getting out and staring up at the building. A nearby plaque proclaimed it to be Fox Tower and Neil knew from Jackson's ramblings that it was the housing for the campus's athletes. 

"Alright little man," Jackson started, earning a glare from Neil which he ignored. "Let's head on in, I know George is probably still waiting up for us. Track team is on the fourth floor, we have it all to ourselves and we're in room 420. No smoking or blazing in the room," he joked, laughing at his own joke when Neil failed to. He trailed after him anyways, eyes growing heavy as they made their way to the elevator.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: Neil meets George & the rest of the team - then he meets the monsters and tries to figure out just how much Kevin knows.
> 
> A/N: am currently accepting name suggestions for the track team members - female / male / nb, feel free to contribute and i'll probably throw them in at some point! 
> 
> Anyways, hope you're enjoying it!


End file.
